Still in the quest for a job

I am still in the quest for a job. I know I just restated my subject line. I'm sorry. I'm allowing myself some extra time for discernment regarding my call to ministry. Now that CPE is over, I can put more of my energy into my job search. In the meantime, I can also work on going through all of my stuff that I've collected from my years of school and teaching and throw away the things I don't need. I've already started to do that. Let me just say that my bedroom is more of a mess right now than it ever has been. My closet is in the process of being gutted so it can be totally cleaned. We shall see how long this process takes. While I am doing all of this, I am also enjoying watching my fellow Americans compete in the Olympics. As much as I watch them compete, I enjoy hearing those human interest stories more than anything. Especially the man from Togo who won a bronze medal in whitewater kayaking. Very cool. The comeback by the Americans in the 400 freestyle relay was amazing. Have a great day! I hope to write again soon.

It's been a month

Yes, it's been a month since the last post, but once CPE is done, I will have more time to actually think about doing the things I haven't been so good about doing this summer, like blogging. I'm sure that next Friday I will want nothing more than to spend oodles of time in the public library in Albert Lea and just type away. I cannot tell you how much I've learned this summer, but let me just say that it's been good, rewarding, but I'm ready to be done and move onto the next chapter of my life. What that is, we'll have to wait and see.

Taking care of myself

Sometimes I find myself forgetting some important things. In my wanting to be there for other people, I forget that sometimes other people want to be there for me. I'm only beginning to learn that lesson. I'm beginning to learn that in its own weird way, allowing people to get to know me is a way for me to take care of myself (if that makes any sense). All I need to do is apply this lesson to my life. Knowing that I have a group of people who can and will hold me accountable in this brings some comfort to my putting this lesson to use.

10 days . . .

. . . since the last post. I know I said I would let you all know how CPE was going, but I've been bad about blogging about my CPE journey. Let me just say it's going good, I'm enjoying it more and more everyday, but it is also really exhausting that when I get home, I don't feel like getting on a computer. I feel like going to bed. I'm on call on Thursday night this week, so hopefully this weekend I will seriously write about some of what I'm learning this summer.

God at work

Sorry for the delay. CPE this week has stood for "Crucified Practically Everyday." It is pretty painful, especially when presenting your own goals. (More about that when I can see the light of day.) A lot has happened this week. Goal presentations, weekly reports, and conversations with patients to name a few. But there's definitely something of which I'm coming to a deeper understanding. As our entire CPE group presented our goals for the summer, I was struck by the fact that personally, this summer is about becoming more comfortable with who we are, with who we know ourselves to be. I have a small problem with that. If God is continually transforming us into the likeness of His Son, then are we ever comfortable with who we are?

CPE: Days 2 and 3

Day 2 (May 28):
Day 2 of CPE began with a 3 hour orientation, most of which consisted of stuff we chaplain interns had already heard and discovered on our first day there. As I sat there, I thought even more in depth about how we are all absolutely scared about whether or not we will know who to call in desperate times of need when dealing with patients. It dawned on me that this is not something I am just supposed to push my way through because it's a requirement (though it's not anymore and I'll explain why later, hopefully tomorrow). It's something I'm supposed to experience. It also dawned on me how much I'm going to hate being professional. I feel like who I am as a person and who I am as a professional are two completely different identities. I don't even like the thought of integrating them. Why don't I? Because I don't consider myself a professional person. Hopefully this doesn't become a problem of mine for the entire summer. P.S. Happy Birthday, Jayna!

Day 3 (May 29):
I have a funny feeling I missed the surprise for today. Why? Well, I got a phone call from the pastor at Atonement Lutheran Church in Jamestown, ND at 11:39 this morning. Unfortunately, I was eating lunch so I could attend something called Spiritual Ground Round (I think that's right). This is something that happens once a month. Today we listened to the music group SeVy. (I'll post a link to their website tomorrow. I strongly encourage you to check it out. They're due to release a CD this coming November.) This afternoon, I also got to make my first set of rounds on my assigned floor for the summer. I'm in the geriatrics unit. I had the opportunity to visit with 3 people while on the floor. Everybody else was elsewhere and half of the patients on the list were getting discharged today.
Back to the Jamestown, ND thing. I didn't get the message until about 7p.m. when I turned my phone on. The pastor will definitely be hearing from me tomorrow. It's 50/50 whether or not he is calling to offer me the position. I'm nervously excited right now because I walked out of the interview not knowing one way or another whether or not it was God's perfect fit for me at this point in time.

CPE: Day 1

Today was my first day of CPE, and I realized that it's exactly where God wants me this summer. I am hoping to blog about my experiences (the non-confidential ones, that is) on a daily basis. My goal is to wake up every morning and ask God to surprise me during each day of my chaplain internship this summer. Feel free to join me on the ride. For those of you who have had CPE before, you can also feel free to join me on the ride.

It's been more than a week

It's been more than a week since the last blog. I don't really have time to write anything right now except to say that my interview in Jamestown, ND was great! I discovered that one of my former pastors from home was the pastor at Atonement before moving to Albert Lea to become a pastor at my home church. It was one of those things that shocked me, but then made wonder even more what on earth God is up to. I will update more later.

Another door shut

Today, God confirmed that He shut the door for Sioux City, IA.

Two doors are left open: Jamestown, ND, and the back door option. I'm trusting that God will reveal to me which door I need to walk through in His perfect timing.

Sleep #2

For two nights in a row now, I've been able to sleep without getting up in the middle of the night praying about where God is leading me next year. Which makes me wonder even more about the back door option.

As far as school goes, I officially have one final left and three days to get ready to move back home for the summer. I'm doing hospital chaplaincy at Rochester Mayo and am looking forward to a different chapter for a while.

My apologies for these lackluster posts, but I've got absolutely nothing profound to say, which is probably alright. On that note, I pray that you are all having a wonderful May and may God continue to bless this season of spring.